“Can you pick me up a pregnancy test?”
Not the words hubby expected to hear after 20 years of marriage, on vacation, in the middle of adopting two kiddos.
Not the words I expected to say at the age of 42.
Hubby just found out that a friend suddenly passed away. In fact, much of the time during travel was spent texting his group of friends who were just receiving news, consoling each other, trying to find out details, sharing in grief. It explained why he was so quiet.
I was busy trying to ease travel anxiety of our 10-year-old while balancing the overwhelming excitement that this road trip to Vegas presented for our 8-year-old.
By the time we got to our destination, I really just wanted to sit by the pool with a margarita in hand, but a nudging had been on me during travel. I am raising kiddos affected by in utero exposure, so I needed to check.
While the kids and I were getting settled into the suite, hubby was preparing to head off to the grocery store to stock up our resort kitchen so I added that last item to the list. “Are you kidding?” was his immediate reply.
He came back with two tests, and both turned out positive. While I arranged to have a blood test when we returned home to be sure, at least I knew I wouldn’t be drinking on this vacation.
So there we were, wondering how much trust to put into these store-bought tests (after all, it could have been early menopause for all we really knew), managing our own anxiety and excitement about what might be, each secretly calling our mothers because we had to tell someone, and then we got a call from home.
A friend was house sitting and caring for our three dogs while we were away. He called to share the unthinkable – our little CeCe was dead. Kind of a freak thing really. We think a heart attack or something.
Our 10 year old started bawling. Our 8-year-old acting as though it was funny (people have different coping mechanisms). Hubby went numb – another loss, another death. I cried.
What a weird vacation this was turning out to be.
Timing.
This sure wasn’t how I would do things.
Not how I would do vacation time. Not how I would do forming a family. Not how I would do loss.
But…
God’s way gave a hurting, soon to be adopted girl, an answer for her prayer for a sister.
A way for a grieving child to have something tangible to work through the immense amount of loss already experienced.
A way to honor an impacting life.
So, Happy Birthday to our Montgomery Grace. You are 2 today, and we are grateful.
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.”
Isaiah 55:8-9
Today my pastor used that scripture when talking how the way God uses His grace in our lives is nothing like the way we might do it in any given situation. He often jokes that he is pretty sure that He was pretty sure that God would of handled much differently than you or would have.
I find your story a testament to both God’s humor and his UNEXPLAINABLE good ways (that are NOT our ways). Thanks for sharing! Happy Birthday, Montgomery Grace!
I am pretty sure I heard God laugh – I know we did! Blessings,
What a blessing she has been to all of us! A true bundle of joy! Happy Birthday, precious one!! God’s plans are so much better than ours!!
SO much better – who would have thought! Love you…